Join Me For Another 10 Weeks! This is the first week of ten weeks starting October 22, 2012

Hi folks! I'm at it again. I'm going for another 20 pound loss in ten weeks. I've recently had another baby, a little girl, she is now five months old and I'm ready to drop some weight.

Saturday, January 30, 2010

Emotional Upset

week 18 1/2 of 20 weeks

weight today: same

total lost: 12 pounds in 18 1/2 weeks

1/2 cup of oatmeal: 150
(sprinkled with cinnamon and sweet-n-low)
6 egg whites: 96
1/2 grapefruit: 40
total: 236

3 1/2 oz chicken breast: 122
1/2 grapefruit: 40
3 egg whites: 48
total: 210
running total: 446

5 oz chicken breast: 175
1/2 cup of brown rice: 85
2 cups of spinach: 10
green peppers: 8
broccoli: 5
carrots: 10
1 tbl of Newman's own vinegar and olive oil salad dressing: 75
total: 376
running total: 822

chocolate protein shake: 110
running total: 932

3/4 cup of brown rice: 128
5 oz chicken breast:175
total: 303
running total:1,235

4 egg whites: 64
1/2 cup of celery: 10
1/2 cup of green peppers: 10
total: 1,319

Today's challenge: I started running out of some of my spinach and other vegetables, but other than that I stayed on target. Oh, I've been busy with some stuff around the house and can't seem to get my run in.

Planned fitness: abdominals

Note on picture: This is what my husband had for breakfast. A Burger King sausage egg and cheese crossanwhich. I'm not even sure how many calories this is. But the kids were eating french toast sticks and cini minis that were dipped in icing. Oh...the smells were delicious! Me? I just stuck to my oatmeal, grapefruit, egg whites and tea.

Emotional Upset

Today marked the first day in this new diet plan of mine where I actually had a little emotional stress related breakdown.

And, no, I'm not even close to that time of the month. Just to rule out that possibility. And I'm not pregnant.

Oh, all the things we women must say to explain our tears.

It is possible I could have been hungry.

Here's what happened. Everyone had breakfast...and I had mine. It was a very satisfying breakfast for me. About an hour or so later...I was confronted with something that felt overwhelming to me. That was upsetting to me...but at the same time that I was upset by that, I also felt upset by the fact that I was missing some of the foods I like to eat. I couldn't sooth any of my feelings of upset with food...which just made me more upset. I'm at a point in this diet where I refuse to cheat until this three weeks is up.

So, instead, I just burst into tears. Lamenting over my feelings of being overwhelmed and also sadness for not being able to eat "fun" food. But, if you think about it, even if I could eat "fun" food, I can't sit there and eat it endlessly. Eventually I'd have to stop. Also, the taste of the food is temporary. Will the taste resolve my feelings of being overwhelmed?

So, I just sat there until I cried it out. Sometimes a good cry will help me clear my head and make me feel better. When I was done, I looked at the clock and figured I should eat my mid-morning snack of chicken breast and egg whites. I usually have a tomato with it, but I ran out of tomatoes a few days I decided to indulge in the last half of grapefruit. The grapefruit and tomato are both forty calories and I felt that eating the grapefruit meets my diet standards. And, since I started this diet, I have come to really relish the taste of grapefruit.

I ate, and enjoyed it and felt much better. I even made myself a coffee and added some sweet-n-low. The coffee may have been cheating somewhat as far as dealing with my emotions, but by the time I drank it I was already in a better mood.

By the time I was done eating and working on my coffee, I didn't feel so overwhelmed. I actually began thinking of a way to deal with the situation. And the rest of the day went well.

So, there you are. It got a little tough for Sunshine Mama today, but I hung in there and didn't cheat. I didn't get in a run like I wanted to. But, I am actually feeling a little more relaxed on that because I know that I will not lose all of my gains from just a few days off of running. That was one very important lesson I learned when I was forced to take three weeks off from running.

Isn't it interesting how setbacks and tears can teach us more about ourselves?

Well...I think that's it for now. I hope you're all enjoying your weekend!


  1. Oh, I needed to read this. I think I need a good cry. I don't cry very easily. I used to when I was young, but I've lost a tenderness that was once a part of who I was. I think I ate that part away! :)

    I'm so glad that you were able to work the upset out in a healthy way and share it with us.


    We knew it wouldn't be good, but the sodium?! Holy toledo!

    As far as the crying, Sunshine Mama, this is good. Hear me out. I've said it before that you are so strong. Something tells me you are one of those people who deep downs knows how strong they are, but if someone pointed it out to them - they might blush. Your cry was probably just the release you needed to keep going the way you are and working so damn hard. (Sorry I know there is a better word to use than damn, but it's what I wanted to say)

    Remember to breathe too. Sounds silly right? Sometimes being reminded to breathe or sit back for a minute is just what I need. You are doing so amazing. You really are! Keep trucking my friend. We are all here for you if you need us too.

    = )

  3. Are we going to start writing each other's blog now? LOL...we are in the same boat on the same ocean.

    We'll get through this!

  4. I had to come back today to mention that as far as yesterday's post about the polar bear plunge - I knew you would be the one to say if I did it, you would do it. I just knew it!

    Keep that head up.

  5. I think that you did exactly what you needed to do... cry. Emotions are hard, and it IS, like you said, so unfortunate that we have to explain our emtions away. Why? Why do we do that? We have emotions for a reason, to FEEL them. And I know, I always want to run over and feed them... lol!
    But that doesn't help the situation at all. God gave us emotions to feel.... to know when something isn't right or off balance in our lives... to relieve stress... so many wonderful things emotions do.

    Good for you, Sunshine! You go girl!

  6. So proud of your accomplishment! I admire your tenacity to continue on this journey, full of strength! I have been "emotionally" eating instead of beating my emotions! So to come here, and read that you overcame that moment brings hope again to me. Tomorrow is a new day, and it's never too late to get back on track! Thank you for encouraging me even though you didn't realized you encouraged me:) Tears are in the air! But...we eventually run out! Blessings to you!!! Heaven

  7. I'm convinced that we learn more about ourselves from stressful, emotional, dissapointing moments than we do from anything else. They sure aren't fun but they are usually necessary. Glad that you hashed it out and are movin forward.

  8. Sunshine Mama's and Daddy Rainmaker's Computer is on the blink.Sunshine Mama is not crying anymore :), but she is a little frustrated with our technical difficilty. Please stand by until we get this resolved. Sincerely from the clipboard of Daddy Rainmaker.

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